I went to a 4th of July parade yesterday with my family. A small Wisconsin-town 4th of July parade. I knew going into it that it was going to be boring, but I didn’t know it was going to be THAT boring.
Patriots do not know how to throw a parade. Especially small-town Wisconsin patriots. You’ve got your tractors, your local politicians, your veterans, your pickup trucks full of who-knows-who throwing candy to the kids in the sidelines, horses shitting on the road, and firetrucks*. THAT’S IT.
*(If you’re going to commit arson, the 4th of July parade is the time to do it!)
Now the gays, THOSE guys know how to throw a parade. Freisdaht, when you have a gay pride parade, I’ll come by, but I’m not showing up for your 7/4/7 parade.
Then there were fireworks later, at my aunt and uncles. I’m not a big fan of fireworks, but I have to say that these were pretty impressive- too impressive, in fact. There’s a point where more fireworks is just more of the same, and ceases to be anything new, and you’re just sitting there waiting for the whole shebang to get over with. That and the grand finale was so damn bright, with so many fireworks going off at once, that I was physically unable to watch it. It made me think: how much did that fireworks show cost to put on? Can’t we like, pay for someone’s food or insulin or something with that?
Oh, and being out so much caused one of my lingering medical wounds to get *really* irritated, and I’m feeling it pretty hard today. God bless America.